Hear, my son, and
receive my sayings, and the years of your life will be many. I have taught you
in the way of wisdom; I have led you in right paths. When you walk, your steps
will not be hindered, and when you run, you will not stumble. Take firm hold of
instruction, do not let go; keep her, for she is your life. Proverbs 4:10-13
NKJV
When a child goes off to college or university, it is usually a step
into adulthood. I remembered my first year of Uni was like being given a ‘get
out of jail’ free card. Just the fact that the choices were in my hand was
great irrespective of the consequences. I left home (albeit for a short time) and was making my own decisions. Even though I was still dependent on my parents for
financing, there was this sense of freedom. I finished Uni when I was twenty-one
and left Nigeria a few months before my twenty second birthday. I missed
growing into adulthood having the guidance of my parent. I was far from home,
there were no cell-phones and Internet as it is now, so communications were far
and in-between. I missed a whole decade of closer relationship with my parents. I have realised that this was a period where the relationship between a child and the parents could either become stronger or weaker.
For many, their twenties (as young adults) is a period of independence –
physically and financially. Subsequently there, is a shift in the relationship
with the parents. It is unfortunate to see many young adults keeping their parents
at arm’s length for whatever reasons that might be. Their
attitude and way of speaking to their parent changes. They feel that their
parents can-not tell them what to do anymore. In fact, any advice from the parent is seen
as controlling. Child-parent relationship can be broken during these early years
of adulthood, some for some time, others forever. Big mistake.
My life reflection is that in normal circumstance a young adult should
not seek to cut-off ties with their parents because of the rush to become
independent. Parents have a special mandate from God. They were the vehicle
through which He brought you to earth. There is a commandment with blessing attached. “Honor your father and mother,” which is the
first commandment with promise: 3 “that it
may be well with you and you may live long on the earth.” Ephesians 6:1-3
NKJV. Do not use the blessing God has given you to
dishonour them.
At any-time of life, parents can be a source of life wisdom in many
ways. Use this decade of your life to seek guidance from your parent especially
in paths they have walked ahead of you. Ask your parent for advice, seek their
counsel, involve them in major decisions of your life. This will bring you joy and
sooth the void in their heart now that you are no longer living at home. This decade
of your life is usually when you can relate with your parent
as one adult to the other, building friendship that deepens as the years roll
by.
If your parents are still alive, why not start now…
To be continued
#prayerfortheweek
Help me Lord to honour my father and mother that it
may be well with me and live long on earth. In Jesus name. Amen
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